News From Grady

I suppose necessity IS the mother of invention.

For some reason Grady Hospital doesn't see fit to allow me access to their Wi-Fi network. Apparently they do not recognize my degree from SOAP OPERA Medical, my graduate degrees from MOTHERHOOD Medical and ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEACHER Medical or my doctorate from GOOGLE Medical.

I get the same sort of reaction from my doctor.
Frankly, it is becoming a bit tiresome.

Marlin is holding his own.

He remains on the vent and will do so indefinitely.
His doctors were unable to find a source of infection and continue to be puzzled as to the reason for his high temperature and his bout with the crazies. They will continue to keep him heavily sedated and on the vent until they are sure that there will be no repeat performance of Marlin From Outer Space.

They tell me his burns are healing as expected.
I wish I could lay eyes on them so I could form my own medical opinion but apparentlytheres that whole medical degree thing.(See above)

He may be facing a skin graft or two but the burns at least are following a normal pattern of healing.

We ask that you pray for the following things:
Complete healing of the burns without the need of skin grafts.
Wisdom for the doctors as they seek the source of the other issues that hinder his recovery.
Peace of mind for Marlin as he sleeps and heals.
Deliverance from the negative emotions that follow any accident.
Strength for my father and sister who are in the midst of their busy season.

Lastly, I want to give thanks for the way my children and husband have stepped up to the plate to make this as easy as possible for me. For my siblings because we love each other no matter what. For my people...you know who you are and you know what we do for each other. Box put us together for a reason.
For Chris who saved my baby brother's life. For bosses who have created a spirit filled work place and who allow us to put family first without guilt when we need to.

One more thing.......
I am typing this on my teeny tiny phone keyboard. Therefore, I deny all responsibility for the random periods that may show up between words instead of spaces.

Just sayin'............

Trial by Fire?



News photo of my brother at the scene of the first fire.
If this photo does not fracture your heart then
you have none.

 I was his first playmate.
He was my roommate and best buddy.

We kept each other entertained.
We argued.
Made up.
Argued some more.

But we always, always took care of each other.

He is the only person I will ever be a big sister to.

He heard my first secrets.
And I cried over a few of his.

He was brave when I was shy and I was good when he was bad.  Smile.

Why is this happening?  Again?

One fire doubles you over with grief
for a cherished pet trapped inside
and memories left charred.

A second?  That's just downright
ridiculous. Uncalled for.

Unfair.

How does it happen that what has
become his worst nightmare
repeats itself?

This is beyond irony.
It is sickening.
And heartbreaking.

My little brother lies in a burn unit
in Atlanta, Ga.

His legs, right arm and head are burned.
A machine breathes for him and he is
burning up with a fever of unknown
origin.

He is very sick.

His sweet Doctor Sarah looks hard
at me when she says "Your brother
is very sick. I'm worried."

I don't know what the next few days
will hold but my God does.

I don't know why this happened.
Again.
But my God does.
And He promised that He would never
leave us.

I find myself struggling to pray.
Overwhelmed. Frustrated.
I just want my brother to be okay.

Right now, we need
your prayers.

And for you to claim this promise with us.

Romans 8:26-28 (The Message)Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.
He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

With my head instead of
my heart,
I choose faith.

In the end, it is all any of us have
and it is the best that we have.

Please pray for my brother.

I was his first playmate
and he was my best buddy.

Just sayin'.............


 

It's Raining....again

Several consecutive days of rain, the bane of teachers
of the younger set, have just about sent my co-workers
and I running for the hills.

Our students have so much pent up energy many of
them are falling from their chairs due to excessive

wiggling. Yes! Young children can and will fall from

their chairs for no apparent reason.

On the bright side...

I am so glad that rain boots are making a come back among the younger set!

It makes me happy to see them clomping around the classroom or lined up against the wall.

They remind me that I am working with children-not pint-sized adults.

As if the copious amount of nasal issues

I am dealing with would allow me to
forget.

Five year olds may be cute in rain boots,
but they are not so good at blowing their noses.

I am writing this post in an effort to put off writing lesson plans.

Shouldn't there be some sort of stipulation in our contracts that excuses those with 20+ years of experience from writing lesson plans?

Really. All I need is a list to remind me what comes next and I'd be just fine. Everybody has something that comes as natural as breathing and teaching fits me like a pair of perfectly fitting panties. (I apoligize to my home grown children who will be mortified that thier mother wrote 'panties' on her blog)

You know what I mean.

A pair of badly fitting panties will ruin your entire day and will prevent you from thinking about anything else at all. A good pair however, just does the job.

The thing I need a plan for is how to find the glasses I've lost or the cell phone I was using just a few seconds ago.

The scary thing is that usually the glasses are on top of my head. As for the cell phone?  Well.....I am usually talking to someone on it while I am feverishly digging through my purse.

Teaching comes easy to me most of the time. I love watching a child use a strategy I have taught them. 

Finding the worksheet I JUST gave directions for is another story.

I have always been absent minded. I think that the people around me daily are used to it now and I am daily grateful to be working with little children.

The little ones eagerly help me look for my pen or my sunglasses and don't seem to think that it is out of the ordinary to have to point out to their teacher that her glasses are perched on her head or hanging from the neck of her blouse.

Lesson plans?

Completely unnecessary at this point in my career.

What I really need is a GPS locator for the marker I was using just a minute ago.

And maybe one for my car keys too.

Just sayin'................

Sister, Sister

Today is my sister's Anniversary.

It is the anniversary of her addition to the family my parents had begun with the adoption of my older brother, Tom.

It never fails to boggle my mind when I consider how unlikely it is that we all found each other.

But then again, God things are always mind boggling.

Some of the pictures in this post are of my homecoming day but you can see how very special our family felt about the day we each came home. 

The hand gently holding my leg and the arms wrapped around me as she held me in her lap have been there as

long as I can remember.

She is the fric to my frac and the peanut butter to my jelly.

I know she is always with me. I know her hand is always there and her arms are always wrapped around me.

 

I know this because we have a bond that transcends flesh and blood, DNA and genetics.

It is a bond that my parents built with purpose

and nurtured carefully.  It is a bond the four

Hargrove brats children have always known.

You mess with one of us, you better be ready to

deal with all four of us.

It has always been that way and it will never change.

We were chosen for each other by God.

Admittedly, we didn't always appreciate each

other.  I am sure my younger brother and I

were occasionally irritating but he and I have

forgiven the frequent abuse handed down by

the older two. 

Smile.

Oh, the stories we can tell.

Oh, the trouble we got into.

Oh the love we have always known.

Just sayin'.............

She Loved Knowing That He Loved Her

When I called to wish him a happy birthday,
he reminded me that this would be the first
New Year's Eve in over 60 years that he didn't
have a sweet heart to kiss.

She often seemed impatient
when he was silly
or sentimental
but she loved knowing
that he loved her.

Those private smiles they shared at sentimental
moments are among the most beautiful things
I have ever seen.

It was more than difficult to say
good bye
to him that night
and even though I tried to stay busy
all I could think about was
how I was about to began a
new year
without a mother.

As New Year's Eve wound down
the sorrow rose higher and higher in my throat.

And I grew quieter.

When my husband mentioned running up to the
neighbors for the last few moments of 2010
I shook my head and said that I was feeling
emotional.

(I can write about my grief but sharing it in
person is not something I have ever done easily.)

The sorrow took over and I was incapable of
speaking at all.  Physically incapable of
explaining my sorrow for my father and for
myself.

There are times when I don't dare open my
mouth to give voice to my grief because
I am afraid that I will lose all control and
give way to heaving sobs.

There are times when I am impatient with
the rest of the world because it does not
remember that each 'first' is a painful
reminder of what I no longer have.

Logical? No.
But then again, I have never promised
to be logical.

The old year died and a new one was born.

And I felt empty.

The Color of Grief is Gray

I know, I know. It's been a month since my last post.

I had to take a break. I blame the holidays...because it's
convenient.

Truthfully, the real reason is the Gray.

The Gray is often at the edge of my vision.

Sometimes I pretend not to see it.
Sometimes I turn and face it belligerently.
Sometimes I run from it.

The Gray can be bad for me.
It has packed on more than a few pounds
of fat and it sucks the productivity out
my free time. The Gray has left me more
distracted and absent minded than usual.

And that's pretty dang distracted.
Tonight I pulled up to a red light,
stopped, looked both ways and
ran it.

The Gray is not my enemy but it can never be my
friend.

To be friends with the Gray would leave me in
the bed all day. Detatched from all those I love.
Withdrawn to a place where all colors and
feelings are muted because loss is less
painful that way. 

I know this because I have been friends with
the Gray before and I had to fight hard to
break up with it.

I made it through my first Thanksgiving as the
Mom in charge. It was pretty awful. For many
different reasons my extended family was very
scattered and for the first time I can remember
we weren't together.  Only four of us gathered
around our table that day but we were thankful
to be together and it was okay.
I kept the Gray pushed away because I was
worried about my oldest who was very sick.
AND I was busy trying to figure out a way to convince
her and her husband that they were still my little 
chicks and would be better off moving into my basement.
That would make it so much easier for me to take care
of them when they are sick.

Just sayin'......

Christmas night I said, somewhat pridefully,
that sometimes the anticipation of a painful
event is worse than
the actual event.

Then I woke up this morning to the Gray.

My little piece of the world seems to be filled
with pain for so many of the people I care about.
I am so tired of feeling helpless against their pain.
I have spent the day teary eyed for my father, my
friend, my brothers and my sister.

What I know is this.
Ignoring pain makes it stronger.
When the pain comes...
it is best to face it and feel it.

Just don't make friends with it.


Just sayin'.........