To My Friend-Because So Many Love You and Yours

Sore at Heart.  Broken.  Broken Hearted.  Heart Sore.

Grief.

It wears like a suit of armor.

It is stiff, unwieldy. Alternately cold and hot.

It rebuffs the sun and repels happiness.  

Grief requires……..no, it demands death. 

Death of one we love, death of a dream, death of a promise, death of an ideal or death of a perception.

Death of any of these leaves you empty, broken and heart sore.

The fact that none of them must remain permanent is of no comfort at first.

My friend and her family are grieving.
If you are here you probably know who I am talking about.
If you do not know her then I apologize for the lack of details.
I will only tell the stories that are mine to tell and this one belongs to my friend and her family.

This friend, like many of us, is human. Smile.
She has made many mistakes in life-just exactly like you and I have.
She has faults. As do I.

I suppose that I want you to understand that underneath the surface that we show to the world we are all the same.
We all rejoice.
We all love.
And we all hurt.

I suppose that I want my friend to know that over the twenty something years of our friendship I have seen the good and the bad.
The funny and the sad.

What I want you to know, my friend, is that I know the steel that lies beneath the surface. 

I want others to know about the times you chose the rocky road, the uphill battle or the way less traveled.

You had a choice early in life that many of your peers wouldn’t have thought twice about.
But you?
You chose the road of sacrifice.

When I confided my struggle with panic attacks…….you put your child in my classroom.
You will never know how your confidence in me gave me the strength to keep my head above the water and to keep on dog paddling through those waters filled with anxiety and heart pounding fear.

Your complete acceptance of something none of us really understood is a gift I will be forever grateful for.

I watched you raise that boy alone for a time. You did it with little monetary support and you let him love ALL his family. Even the ones who didn’t really deserve it at the time.

You had a baby with a pretty foot.  Where others might have seen it as something to cry about…..you simply called it his pretty foot.

You have calmly weathered multiple stitches, broken bones, emergency appendectomies and freak accidents with your children and rightfully earned the right to be my medical colleague. Smile.

I was there when you helped give a gift that broke your heart.  I know the cost.

You said the words I have never forgotten.
You said them when I called with grief and pain of my own.
You said,
Hang in there. We’re gonna circle the wagons around you and it’s gonna be okay.

Well, my friend.
Hang in there. 
We are circling the wagons right now and it IS gonna be okay. 

If you have read this far then you must love my friend too.

PLEASE leave her a comment. 
PLEASE write words of love and encouragement for her and her family.
I want to show them that they are loved by soooooo many.

If you have trouble leaving a comment In-box me on Facebook and I’ll add it for you.

It is time to circle the wagons.


Just sayin'.....................................